selfcareafterrape

selfcareafterrape:

There is an amazing power that comes from knowing you aren’t alone. That what you feel and what you’re going through has been gone through before. That you are not over reacting.

There is an amazing power that comes from being able to talk to other survivors. From being able to ask questions and…

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selfcareafterrape

selfcareafterrape:

As survivors, we have a lot of painful thoughts. Thoughts about ourselves, thoughts about what happened, thoughts about the future.

The first thing you need to do is accept that these are painful thoughts, and not necessarily true. In fact, they’re almost definitely not true.

These…

kansas-city90210

shmoke-what:

oliviatheelf:

"Craving sensation: feeling unreal" was such a huge part of the beginning of my relapse. I was convinced that people in front of me didn’t even exist and I kept touching things and trying to feel sensation. I’m reblogging because I know that that was so horrifying for me and I never want anyone else to go through it. 

In case someone needs to see this

selfcareafterrape
selfcareafterrape:

The Basics:
Common Responses to Rape/Sexual Assault(ppt)
Talking About Trauma (ppt)
Traumaversaries
Why You Aren’t Bad for Loving Your Abuser.
Need Help With:
Sleep
Nightmares
Surviving the Holidays (ppt)
Overstimulated Nerves
Self-Injury (ppt)
Flashbacks (ppt)
Dissociating (ppt)

Triggers:
I’m triggered- Now What?
More On Triggers
On Purposely Triggering Yourself
Boundaries:
Boundaries (ppt)
Boundaries 101
Boundaries: How to set them
Self-Care:
What is Self Care Anyway?
BACE Method
Self Care When You Lack a Sense of Self
Interpersonal Self-Care
Emotional Self Care
Physical Self Care
Consent/sex:
Intimacy After Rape
Lets Talk Consent
Lets Talk Sex
Sexuality After Rape
For Friends/Family/Partners of Survivors:
How to Help a Friend Who Has Been Raped.(ppt)
Avoiding Awkward- How to talk about rape when we talk to survivors.(ppt)
Sometimes the easiest thing to say is the worst.
A Friend is Self Harming (ppt)
Comfort In. Complain Out.
What Can I Do?
A Friend is Dissociating.(ppt)

selfcareafterrape:

The Basics:

Common Responses to Rape/Sexual Assault(ppt)

Talking About Trauma (ppt)

Traumaversaries

Why You Aren’t Bad for Loving Your Abuser.

Need Help With:

Sleep

Nightmares

Surviving the Holidays (ppt)

Overstimulated Nerves

Self-Injury (ppt)

Flashbacks (ppt)

Dissociating (ppt)

Triggers:

I’m triggered- Now What?

More On Triggers

On Purposely Triggering Yourself

Boundaries:

Boundaries (ppt)

Boundaries 101

Boundaries: How to set them

Self-Care:

What is Self Care Anyway?

BACE Method

Self Care When You Lack a Sense of Self

Interpersonal Self-Care

Emotional Self Care

Physical Self Care

Consent/sex:

Intimacy After Rape

Lets Talk Consent

Lets Talk Sex

Sexuality After Rape

For Friends/Family/Partners of Survivors:

How to Help a Friend Who Has Been Raped.(ppt)

Avoiding Awkward- How to talk about rape when we talk to survivors.(ppt)

Sometimes the easiest thing to say is the worst.

A Friend is Self Harming (ppt)

Comfort In. Complain Out.

What Can I Do?

A Friend is Dissociating.(ppt)

gynocraticgrrl

Coping with Flashbacks:

1. Tell yourself that you are having a flashback, and that you are safe now.

2. Remind yourself that the worst is over. The feelings and sensations you are experiencing are memories of the past. The actual event has already occurred and you survived.

3. Breathe. When we get scared we stop breathing normally. As a result, our body begins to panic from the lack of oxygen, which in itself causes a great deal of panic feelings; pounding in the head, tightness, sweating, feeling faint, shakiness, and dizziness. When we breathe deeply enough, the panic feeling can decrease. Breathing deeply means breathing in so that your diaphragm expands. If you were to put your hand on your stomach, your stomach would push against your hand when you inhale.

4. Get grounded. This means stamping your feet on the ground to remind yourself that you have feet and can get away now if you need to. (There may have been times before when you could not get away, now you can.) Being aware of all five senses can also help you ground yourself.

5. Reorient to the present. Begin to use your five senses in the present. Look around and see the colours in the room, the shapes of things, the people near, etc. Listen to the sounds in the room: your breathing, traffic, birds, people, cars, etc. Feel your body and what is touching it: your clothes, your own arms and hands, the chair, or the floor supporting you.

6. Get in touch with your need for boundaries. Sometimes when we are having a flashback we lose the sense of where we leave off and the world begins, as if we do not have skin. Wrap yourself in a blanket, hold a pillow or stuffed animal, go to bed, sit in a closet, any way that you can feel yourself truly protected from the outside.

7. Get support. Depending on your situation you may need to be alone or may want someone near you. In either case it is important that your close ones know about flashbacks so they can help with the process, whether that means letting you be by yourself or being there with you.

8. Take the time to recover. Flashbacks can be very powerful. Give yourself time to make the transition from this powerful experience. Don’t expect yourself to jump into other activities right away. Take a nap, a warm bath, or some quiet time. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Do not beat yourself up for having a flashback.

9. Honour your experience. Appreciate yourself for having survived that horrible time. Respect your body’s need to experience a full range of feelings.

10. Be patient. It takes time to heal. It takes time to learn appropriate ways of taking care of yourself and developing effective ways of coping in the here and now. - University of Alberta, Sexual Assault Centre

selfcareafterrape

selfcareafterrape:

shota-goat:

veggielezzyfemmie:

selfcareafterrape:

Respecting a survivor’s sense of self is really the biggest thing- and as always, Support and Affirm Worth.

I hope you guys are having a fabulous Wednesday, and as always, take care of yourselves <3

Please, please read, comprehend, and never forget this. It could drastically change how a survivor lives the rest of their life after an attack. It could also be the line between being an asshole and a true support system for someone. 

But wait, how do make sure you don’t take them to a place where their attacker might be if you’re not supposed to ask who it was?

That’s if they have volunteered that information.

It was a point I added in due to an experience while I was in college- well- two experiences.

There was a member of the WC that i worked with that was well aware of who my attacker was. and yet- when I /put together and performed/ at an event against domestic violence.

she invited him.

and then again- she threw a halloween party and invited both me and my attacker and didn’t inform me that she had done so.

Also- I think.. it would be appropriate later on- not to say ‘well who did it’ but if you’re going to a thing/making an event- to go ‘hey, I want to make sure this is a safe place for you- is there anyone I should avoid inviting?’ or a ‘is there anyone you’d like me to let you know if I see them around? that way we can leave or you can at least be prepared?’

and accept if they say no. that they don’t want to tell you. 

Which is something that ‘Who did it?’ doesn’t allow. At least not without the person feeling awkward/worse. 

cutebabe
caskisses:

UNDERSTANDING
types of anxiety disorders // what is panic disorder? // panic disorder &amp; agoraphobia // tips to cope with a panic attack // 3 ways to help someone having a panic attack // 4 things you shouldn’t say to someone having a panic attack // what is obsessive compulsive disorder? // more on ocd // coping with ocd // living with someone who has ocd // what is post-traumatic stress disorder? // coping with ptsd // 10 tips for understanding someone with ptsd //what is social anxiety disorder? // coping with social anxiety disorder // how worrying affects the body
CALMING DOWN
wikihow // helpful tips // 3 practices to calm an anxious mind // how-to guide // creating your mind palace // 3 breathing exercises // 6 breathing exercises // yoga bunny // meditation for beginners // about meditation // yoga with connie bowman // 20 minute yoga routine // yoga to make you happy // guided meditation 
MASTERPOSTS
back to school // helpful websites // happy things // feel good things // college survival // a lil bit of everything // a really big masterpost // music masterpost // diy home spa // coping skills &amp; distractions // for bad days // bad day remedies
BLOGS
yogaholics // killyouranxiety // thatanxietyblog // lets-beat-mental-illness // recoverykitty // yogis-yoginis // healthylifestylechoice // happier-soon // rising.co.vu // catfromhell // you-can-just-breathe (trigger warning: autoplay) // recovery-in-pink // forescent // recoverytree
MUSIC
note to self. // good feelings // coffee shop acoustic // bubble baths, coffee and hardback books // rad covers // a little bit of everything // good morning // breathe // acoustic // conquer school // wheels on the road // choose happy // coffee shop tunes // my faves // good vibes // late winter nights // lovely quiet // overwhelmed // tonight you’re perfect // random [feel]goodies // rewind // crawling back to you // sleepy tunes 
RELAXING NOISES
soundsleeping // noisli // naturesoundsfor.me // ambient-mixer // calmsound // calm.com // mynoise.net // rainymood // coffitivity // soundrown
OTHER
make a grounding box // top 10 essential oils to relieve anxiety // personal care products from walgreens // aromatherapy // 19 natural remedies for anxiety // lots and lots of sweaters // stuffed animals // books (free) // used books for 1 cent // electric blankets // soft pillows

caskisses:

UNDERSTANDING

types of anxiety disorders // what is panic disorder? // panic disorder & agoraphobia // tips to cope with a panic attack // 3 ways to help someone having a panic attack // 4 things you shouldn’t say to someone having a panic attack // what is obsessive compulsive disorder? // more on ocd // coping with ocd // living with someone who has ocd // what is post-traumatic stress disorder? // coping with ptsd // 10 tips for understanding someone with ptsd //what is social anxiety disorder? // coping with social anxiety disorder // how worrying affects the body

CALMING DOWN

wikihow // helpful tips // 3 practices to calm an anxious mind // how-to guide // creating your mind palace // 3 breathing exercises // 6 breathing exercises // yoga bunny // meditation for beginners // about meditation // yoga with connie bowman // 20 minute yoga routine // yoga to make you happy // guided meditation 

MASTERPOSTS

back to school // helpful websites // happy things // feel good things // college survival // a lil bit of everything // a really big masterpost // music masterpost // diy home spa // coping skills & distractions // for bad days // bad day remedies

BLOGS

yogaholics // killyouranxiety // thatanxietyblog // lets-beat-mental-illness // recoverykitty // yogis-yoginis // healthylifestylechoice // happier-soon // rising.co.vu // catfromhell // you-can-just-breathe (trigger warning: autoplay) // recovery-in-pink // forescent // recoverytree

MUSIC

note to self. // good feelings // coffee shop acoustic // bubble baths, coffee and hardback books // rad covers // a little bit of everything // good morning // breathe // acoustic // conquer school // wheels on the road // choose happy // coffee shop tunes // my faves // good vibes // late winter nights // lovely quiet // overwhelmed // tonight you’re perfect // random [feel]goodies // rewind // crawling back to you // sleepy tunes 

RELAXING NOISES

soundsleeping // noisli // naturesoundsfor.me // ambient-mixer // calmsound // calm.com // mynoise.net // rainymood // coffitivity // soundrown

OTHER

make a grounding box // top 10 essential oils to relieve anxiety // personal care products from walgreens // aromatherapy // 19 natural remedies for anxiety // lots and lots of sweaters // stuffed animals // books (free) // used books for 1 cent // electric blankets // soft pillows

My name is Emily Marie.
I am a 20 year old female, a rat owner, a feminist, and a junkie.
I am struggling with PTSD and daily flashbacks from the rape and molestation I endured as a child, and the sexual/physical/emotional abuse I just recently escaped from.
I am finally breaking the silence on what has happened to me, and have decided to make this blog, seperate from my personal one, that focuses entirely on my recovery from the hell I have been trapped in.
-
April 12th, 2014